Why being in a bad relationship makes you age faster

anxiety relationship stress relationships Feb 03, 2023

One of my areas of expertise is working with couples. Often, I see them come in where one (or both) are chronically stressed.

However, what people don’t realize is the impact that their relationship is having on them, internally and externally.

Find out what's behind this phenomenon.

Relationship problems can make people age faster.

It might sound crazy, but I’ll walk you through what's behind that.

But please keep in mind that this is not a substitute for professional psychological treatment.

The content of this article is solely my opinion on the subject and should not be considered any type of therapy or treatment.

The explanation behind this phenomenon

There are tons of research that show that people under chronic stress have more hormones associated with aging pumping through their body.

Those hormones negatively impact the body making people appear older (people that have been under chronic stress can look up to 13 years older than people who haven’t).

There are people who we can look at and realize that they have dealt with a lot of stress.

And relationships can, certainly, contribute to this.

So, ask yourself: how many hours per week does your relationship cause you stress?

— Just a few moments here and there.

If there are frequent occurrences of guilt, conflict, feeling bad, uncared for, or under-appreciated, they can add up to becoming “chronic.”

Even if they happen for “a few minutes at a time.”

People who handle stress better also age better

As we’ve seen, people who handle stress better and know how to emotionally regulate, also age better. Aging is not a be-all and end-all.

I get that aging is a naturally occurring process and all of us will have to deal with it one way or another but bad relationships can speed up the process.

You may be reading this article because you’ve taken my quiz and it’s given you an idea of how much stress you’re dealing with.

If this isn’t something you've done, I highly recommend taking the quiz https://www.drgexplains.com/relationship-stress-quiz , and filling out the checklist I send you as a free gift.

Using that checklist for about 3 weeks helps you understand patterns, the type of relationship stress you’re dealing with, and the amount of self-care that you’re getting — because self-care can help offset some of the issues.

Being in a constant state of fight or flight

Another problem that comes with chronic stress is being in a constant state of fight or flight. In this state, adrenaline starts pumping through your body to help you deal with danger.

In a very primal sense, it might help you escape from a wild animal or dangerous situation.

However, your body doesn’t know how to differentiate the different kinds of stress and deals with them using the same physical mechanisms within the body.

Your mind is constantly having to think about your next move and you’ll be in a state of trying to avoid stressors.

If that happens often, even if only a few times a week, it’s when it can become chronic.

There is also internal aging

Aging doesn’t just happen externally - which is what most people are concerned about - it’s also internal.

And it can cause heart inflammation, increase anxiety, the likelihood of alcoholism, etc.

Chronic stress can challenge so many systems in the body and it’s really important that people understand that having arguments all the time, feeling angry, frustrated, or persecuted can lead to all sorts of changes (and damages) in the body.


How to have a better relationship

You can start dealing with relationship stress right now by learning 5 anxiety-reducing tools that I use with my therapy clients for a fraction of a therapy session.

They are practical and easy to implement.

I’ll walk you through how to use them and give you all the materials you need so you can deal with the stress and anxiety you experience inside your relationship.

No matter how toxic your relationship is, there is always something you can do to get through this, and I’m here to help you every step of the way.

Learn more about how your relationship is making you age faster by taking the quiz here


Are you having relationship problems? Want to know how to deal with your anxiety?

Get my free resources